We’ve been home for one month. Kind of hard to believe and kind of feels like longer. Like really, Miss Lena was such a little terror just one month ago? All of her behavior has improved so much with routine and time.

Like I mentioned, Lena is really adjusting. She rarely gets upset at all anymore. And when she does, it usually because a need needs to be met… sleep, food, too hot, too cold, scared, etc. It is no longer out of grief or for attention. She is thriving. Every night, she sits on my lap and cuddles with me and asks for kisses from me and her papa. Throughout the day, she frequently climbs on my lap. When it is just the two of us, she is often content to just sit on my lap and watch me work through emails. Or like she did tonight, just sit on a chair waiting me while I screenprinted a t-shirt. One of her challenges is that she hates being left out. So even if she is happy playing with me one minute, if papa and Ilya are taking the dogs out, she wants to go too.

Ilya is still adjusting, yet he is also flourishing. As the rest of us sink back into life, he is still figuring out his place. He is still learning what we expect of him. His vocabulary continues to grow like crazy as he repeats everything we say. He talks or sings non-stop, in a crazy mix of Russian and English. He is so creative too. He sometimes calls us “Mommy” “Poppy” and “Lainey”. Other times, she is just “Len”. He adores his Papa so much that when Papa comes home from work, we girls are deafened by ear drum pounding screams of “Papa’s home! Papa’s home!” He asks his Papa to carry him constantly, which led Papa to ask me one day, “when do kids no longer want to be carried?” He can really be fun or really wear us out or both.

One of the biggest challenges for us, adopting two child who are very different, is how we treat them when they are together. Despite just 11 months apart between them, they almost always have very different reactions to situations. The way we treat them needs to adapt for each of them, but that does not always go over so well. For example, Lena needs to be carried more often, which makes Ilya jealous. With Ilya, he will take the time to play with toys like puzzles by himself and Lena likes to copy this behavior, but gets frustrated when she cannot do them without one of us helping her. And sometimes resorts to trying to get in the way of Ilya doing his puzzle.

Just another example. One photo of the three of us, but when I gently pulled his hand down, trying to get a better photo, he got angry and started pouting.

So back to just the two of us.

We’re still just chugging along, trying to figure out what makes each other tick…

Last week, I got a very encouraging email from a fellow blogger who has been home just a couple weeks longer than us with her 3 year old daughter. She wanted to let me know how she struggled at first and now things were now improving, right around the one month mark.

I was thinking about this last night, as yesterday was one full month we’ve had custody of Ilya and Lena. And as I reflected on yesterday last night, I was thinking “wow, that wasn’t so bad.” Lena barely cried or screamed at naptime two days ago and not at all yesterday. That makes my day so much better. Three days ago, she was doing her 20-minute crying and screaming routine.

I’ve learned that Ilya really does better with just one adult around. Even if the second adult is not a disciplinarian with him, he really just does better if it is just me. Since my mom is home, and Aaron is back at work, he has been behaving a lot better this week. Wayyy fewer tantrums. He constantly amazes me with his English. Today, we were joking around. I was pretending to eat his play-doh food he was making me and then I told him to eat, ’cause this was his lunch. He said to me, “Ne cashow(don’t want), ne play-doh. I’ll take ummm… pasta.” He sings the ABC song ALL THE TIME. This morning, he asked me if there was milk on his cereal. He is a very “with it” kid. Always paying attention, asking questions, repeating things. One of the funniest things about his speech is that he cannot say “h”. It always comes out as a “c” sound. So hands are cands, hurt is curt.

Lena has really, really improved. I mentioned the no-screaming at naptime thing. I think we could make it through the whole day without her screaming now. If she takes a decent nap, she is way better behaved in the evening. Lena has such a great sense of humor. This morning, the dogs started barking when Aaron let them outside and Lena started crying. This was 5am. Instead of getting up and sitting with her until she calmed down I just brought her into bed with me. We both fell back to sleep and then I woke up to her tickling me. She has developed a good bond with me. Every night when we watch a movie, I settle in, then turn to her and ask if she wants to sit on my lap. Without fail, every time, she gets so excited.

We’ve also added a nightly bath to our routine. Both of them get SO excited about it. BUBBLES. We have no bath toys, but last week, my mom suggested giving them cups to play with. Huge hit. They love pouring the water with their cups. Both of them had been throwing fits about getting out of the tub, but yesterday, I told Lena it was time to get out and she stood right up. As I got her ready for bed, Ilya picked up all of the toys and put them in the basket next to the tub. He asks me every night for his train pajamas. Too bad the shirt is so small on him that it comes unbuttoned within a few minutes. I may have to be on the lookout for different train pajamas!

Here are their weekly photos, which I forgot one week. Ilya finally decided to have fun with it!