Category Archives: Everyday Life

Everyday Life

Thank you, Babushka Lola!

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When my mom was here, she got the kid’s pajamas. Lena’s were a bit too big and Ilya’s looked too small, so we went to exchange them the other day. I let the kids pick out their own pajamas.


Ilya instantly decided on these. They’re pretty awesome. I like that they are two pieces, but the top does not have buttons (and is not super tight). They fit him very well, as you can see.


Lena did not really pick out pajamas. I gave her the chance, but she did not really get it. So, I picked out these and asked her if she liked them. They’re a hit! A bit big, but she will be able to wear them through the spring.

Everyday Life

Progress

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Last week, I got a very encouraging email from a fellow blogger who has been home just a couple weeks longer than us with her 3 year old daughter. She wanted to let me know how she struggled at first and now things were now improving, right around the one month mark.

I was thinking about this last night, as yesterday was one full month we’ve had custody of Ilya and Lena. And as I reflected on yesterday last night, I was thinking “wow, that wasn’t so bad.” Lena barely cried or screamed at naptime two days ago and not at all yesterday. That makes my day so much better. Three days ago, she was doing her 20-minute crying and screaming routine.


I’ve learned that Ilya really does better with just one adult around. Even if the second adult is not a disciplinarian with him, he really just does better if it is just me. Since my mom is home, and Aaron is back at work, he has been behaving a lot better this week. Wayyy fewer tantrums. He constantly amazes me with his English. Today, we were joking around. I was pretending to eat his play-doh food he was making me and then I told him to eat, ’cause this was his lunch. He said to me, “Ne cashow(don’t want), ne play-doh. I’ll take ummm… pasta.” He sings the ABC song ALL THE TIME. This morning, he asked me if there was milk on his cereal. He is a very “with it” kid. Always paying attention, asking questions, repeating things. One of the funniest things about his speech is that he cannot say “h”. It always comes out as a “c” sound. So hands are cands, hurt is curt.


Lena has really, really improved. I mentioned the no-screaming at naptime thing. I think we could make it through the whole day without her screaming now. If she takes a decent nap, she is way better behaved in the evening. Lena has such a great sense of humor. This morning, the dogs started barking when Aaron let them outside and Lena started crying. This was 5am. Instead of getting up and sitting with her until she calmed down I just brought her into bed with me. We both fell back to sleep and then I woke up to her tickling me. She has developed a good bond with me. Every night when we watch a movie, I settle in, then turn to her and ask if she wants to sit on my lap. Without fail, every time, she gets so excited.

We’ve also added a nightly bath to our routine. Both of them get SO excited about it. BUBBLES. We have no bath toys, but last week, my mom suggested giving them cups to play with. Huge hit. They love pouring the water with their cups. Both of them had been throwing fits about getting out of the tub, but yesterday, I told Lena it was time to get out and she stood right up. As I got her ready for bed, Ilya picked up all of the toys and put them in the basket next to the tub. He asks me every night for his train pajamas. Too bad the shirt is so small on him that it comes unbuttoned within a few minutes. I may have to be on the lookout for different train pajamas!

Here are their weekly photos, which I forgot one week. Ilya finally decided to have fun with it!

Everyday Life

Slow blogging

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Well, even after my mom goes home tomorrow, my blogging might be a bit slow. Why? Because my computer is being fixed AGAIN. Looks like another bad hard drive. I just had it replaced this summer. Frustrating. It will be Tuesday before I have it back.

Yesterday we had our appointments at the International Adoption Clinic at Children’s Mercy in Kansas City. If you are considering going to the IA clinic there, GO. They were so wonderful. All the nurses came in and gawked over the kids. The doctor spent over and hour, maybe an hour and a half with us. He was totally present, talking to me, interacting with the kids, etc. We are having tons of tests run, and we must wait for the results. Most of them will be in by the end of next week. I have some concerns, nothing major, but I am glad that we will be getting some answers. From everything the doctor could tell in his examination, they are both healthy. Ilya is in the 50th percentile for height and weight and Lena in the 3rd. I was very glad my mom was there for the appointments too. I had never been to Children’s Mercy before, so we had to figure out where to go. And entertaining kids at a 3-hour doctor’s appointment is not easy!

Things are still challenging much of the time. This has been Ilya’s week to be difficult, it seems like. Today, we picked some stuff up for Aaron’s work, drove it over to the office. Well, Aaron took it inside and I had to go the bathroom, so I went with him. I guess Ilya started crying and trying to get out of his carseat when I left (my mom was with them). When I got back in the car, he was fine, but he quickly got upset again, when I tightened the harness on his carseat a bit. I thought would calm down when Aaron got in the car. Well, Aaron turned around and said “Ilya!” (like he was excited to see him) and Ilya totally melted down.

He has just been off this week, maybe because of the change of my mom being here (although he does seem to really like her). He has had plenty of moments where he has stopped communicating and gotten upset when we don’t respond. Like at dinner, he will just point into the kitchen, instead of asking us for more. Or last night, he asked Aaron for more and when Aaron picked up Ilya’s bowl, he started screaming. Wait, what? You just said you wanted more and I was going to get you more? It has been almost constant this week. Crying one minute and laughing the next.

Lena and my mom really like each other, so that is good. The other day, I hopped out of the car for a minute to run in somewhere and Lena got upset with just my mom and Ilya in the car. This surprised me, that she is attached to me enough to get upset about that! It was a nice surprise. She really does like my mom a lot, probably because my mom makes sure Lena is always laughing and smiling.

I am going to miss my mom when she goes home! It is so nice to have another adult around. It makes everything a lot easier. Even when it’s 3 adults to 2 kids, it’s still so much easier. One person to make dinner, one to hang out with the kid who is playing nicely and one to sit with the kid who is melting down.

Everyday Life

Alive and Well

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We’re still alive and well here. Our recent snow storm did NOT get the best of us. The reason why we haven’t been blogging? Babushka is here! Lola Babushka, that is, my mom. She is here from Sunday to Sunday. We have been having lots of fun, keeping busy. Aaron has been home most of this week too, because of all of our snow. It is nice. I have been staying up a bit later and I don’t feel like every drop of energy is sucked out of me by bedtime.

My mom took a shower this morning and when we came home around 4pm today, there was still water in the tub. Um, what? So, we added some Draino. Nothing. More Draino. Nothing. All three of us adults have tried using a snake on it. Nothing. Aaron started taking the pipes apart and about 45 minutes in, discovered the problem. One of the pipes had frozen water in it. Ah, lovely. Water drains further down, so that was just our problem.

I’ll try to write a longer, more exciting blog post soon. If you asked questions about the orphanage in the last post, make sure to read the comments from Bethany and Kelly. Good info.

Everyday Life

Q&A 1/10/11

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Did you get to see where your children slept? Were they all in one room with beds everywhere or were they separated, boys, girls?
I have not seen it in person. I have seen it in photos. I think it is mixed. Bethany? Kelly? Who knows? 

Do they seem to be afraid when it is nighttime bedtime (not day naps)? Do you have any idea what their bedtime routine was like before you adopted them?
They’re actually MUCH, MUCH better at night than during the day. They both need someone in there with them, but if they have each other, that is fine. I am not familiar with their routine. I do know that they took a long afternoon nap at the orphanage, but that’s about it.

Have you found your children to have food issues, such as gorging and hiding food for later? We have experienced this to varying degrees with our adopted children.
We have not yet. They’re both pretty good with food and can even be a bit picky, especially Lena. She often does not finish all that is on her plate. They both accept when meals are over. They also will wait for everyone to eat if we remind them that they need to (and there is nothing too tempting in front of them). Neither of them has tried to hide any food from us, although I am not sure how they could. And they definitely do not gorge. At meals, they, especially Ilya, get a bit goofy and silly and we frequently have to remind them to eat. He does eat a lot, though, if he likes what he’s eating!

Do you have any advice for parents preparing to travel to your children’s region?
Nope. Honestly, from what I have heard about other regions, it is a VERY EASY region. My advice would be the same for parents adopting from this region as it would be adopting anywhere else in Ukraine or in the world. But, I am not sure I am qualified to give adoption advice!



Will the children enter kindergarten/preschool or do you plan to homeschool them?
I am not sure yet. I would love to homeschool them, but I am not sure that I have what it takes! I am not very impressed with public school (and I went to public school, so believe me, I know). We’ll see.


How is Lena´s language acquisition going?
English? It’s not really. Sometimes she talks, but we can not understand what she is saying at all, unless we just told her to repeat something. She has learned a lot of sign language, thanks to Signing times (and my sister who gave it to us), but she still does not use it as a way to communicate. Right now, we basically have to guess her needs. She does say some words “mama” “doggies”. Sometime “papa” but that is rare. “Baby”. “Babushka”. I think she is on a 12-24 month level with language. There may be a medical reason for her developmental delay, beyond just being in an orphanage, and I am eager to talk to a doctor about that.


Mine comes from the perspective of Ilya being 4, and do you think he’ll be adequately adjusted when it comes time for school to start. Of course, if you don’t send him to preschool, then he has a good year and a half before Kindergarten starts.
I think he’ll be okay to start preschool. He is already pretty attached to both of us, and I imagine he will bond a lot more in the next 8 months. But like I said above, who knows if we’re going to send him. 


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What are your thoughts on adopting two unrelated kids at the same time, rather than one at a time, now that you’re home? Would you recommend that to a friend that is adopting?
Yes, I would absolutely recommend it. Especially in a situation like ours, where we do not already have children. Ilya and Lena need each other’s company and support. The fact that they knew each other but were not in the same group really worked to our advantage too. The same with the male/female combo. Everything worked out so they were not competitors and quickly became friends. I will tell you, it is certainly harder on us at times. We do not really get much of a break, sometimes they wake each other up, etc. But, I do think it’s worth it, especially for the relationship that Ilya and Lena have.