I need… a big house. A new car. New clothes. Things for my kids. A new collar for my dog. More food to eat. More leisure time. A nice vacation.
I have to admit, I am growing weary. Of this American lifestyle. All of the needs, which are really just wants. I fall victim to it. I am tired. Of needing.
I just want to be grateful for all that I have been blessed with. Willing to give much of it away.
I want to have my eyes wide open to things like… orphans, human trafficking, homelessness, the world water crisis… and on and on.
The first time I went to New Orleans, after Hurricane Katrina, I knew that I had to go back. If you experience something like a disaster area, an orphanage, etc., I think it’s hard to go back to your normal life. It all seemed so trivial to me, compared to what was going on in New Orleans. How can I go to class each day, when I could be gutting or rebuilding someone’s home?
Sometimes, I wonder how I can enjoy my ice cream, which someone in Africa does not have clean water. I wonder how I can enjoy this movie when a girl across the world is being sold in sexual slavery. How can I live like this?
Simply put, my heart is broken for this world. My heart is broken for those who need what I cannot give them. But, my heart is also broken for those who are comfortable. Those who look away from the suffering of this world.
For Christians who are “lukewarm”, content to hang on to what they have “earned”. They probably break my heart the most.
I would like to tell you that I am sorry if you are sick of hearing about how broken-hearted I am. But I’m not.